franciscoramon | riverview ∆ ic inbox ∆ @ciscodelamancha

[ Oh. ]

man, i so wish i could say you were wrong
but that sounds about right.

[ Cisco's own recently increased pessimism aside, he doesn't want to push Taako even deeper into a low mood than he already might be. ]

at least not all the agendas are bad
there really are people out there who just want to do good, and help others and make the world better even for all the shitheads that don't deserve it.

[He remembers telling Ellie that it was better to never trust anyone, to never rely on anyone, and that was... before he remembered Lup and the IPRE, but some of that paranoia still lingers. He spent ten years believing he was alone, the only person he'd trusted in that time had ruined his life.]

i mean, i know that

most of the people here are way too nice and good and shit, i dont fucking get it

[ Cisco's actually thought something along the same lines, and from what he's heard, Taako's world is much harsher than his own. So whatever adjustment Cisco had had to make, it must have been double for Taako. ]

yeah people are super friendly here.
made me all kinds of paranoid when i first showed up.

[ Taako had seen some of that paranoia - Cisco had asked him point-blank why he was being so nice, why Taako was befriending him in the first place. ]

i know it's not the same but there's a lot of adults here who'll still care about you even if you fuck stuff up
i mean everybody fucks up now and then

fuck, right? i for sure thought clark was secretly evil or something, he was just too good

[Clark is Too Pure and it's endlessly baffling.]

for ten years i was a completely fucking different person

i dont.

its weird

[For all that seems like a tangent, it's related to things like this, how hard it is to trust people and to believe that they won't abandon him if he makes a mistake. He's never really talked about this, the way losing his memories of Lup changed him, and how hard it is to reconcile what feels like two versions of himself.]

i thought YOU were secretly evil. just for a couple minutes. don't feel bad tho i think that about everybody.

[ Another one of those things he wouldn't admit if they weren't having drunk texting soul baring sharing time. ]

while you didn't remember?
yea, that's gotta be a hell of a trip.
makes sense, though. you thought you had a whole different life, right?

im just real fucking charming, thats not the same as like, nice

[That possibly only makes sense to him, but he feels like there's a difference between being friendly and charming because he's an outgoing person, to being the sort of genuinely kind person that Clark and Eddie are.]

i thought i'd been alone. only person id ever fucking let close was sazed and look where that ended up.
and now i get it, i remember my family and i know i wasnt alone but ive got like, two sets of memories. two versions of everything that happened to me

well, maybe that's true. but you've been nice to ME on several occasions, no matter what you say.

i actually don't know who sazed is or where that ended up.

yeah.
you might not have always been alone, but you were alone for those years. that has an effect, you know?
and after all the stuff that happened, it's not like you can go back to being the person you were before lucretia messed with your memories.

i guess... you just gotta build a whole new you out of whatever's left.

thats cause i like you, duh

sazed was my assistant. friend. sous chef. whatever.

he got mad cause i wouldnt let him be in the show and he tried to kill me by poisoning a dish. killed the crowd instead. kinda fucked up that whole famous wizard chef thing i had going on

[He's glad he's drunk for this, it makes it easier to talk about.]

youer right i just dont fucknig know how to do that

holy fuck, dude.

[ As awful as Eobard's betrayal had been, as deeply as it had fucked Cisco up, it had at the very least not had a body count that extended beyond Cisco himself. It doesn't escape Cisco's notice that Taako called Sazed a friend, said he was the only person he'd let close during those years without his sister. That kind of betrayal leaves a mark, and Cisco knows it. ]

that's so goddamn messed up
what a backstabbing psychopath

[ And Taako had never mentioned this, that anything had messed up his celebrity chef reputation. Probably not the kind of thing that's easy to bring into a conversation. But... Cisco's had Taako's food. He knows how good it is, and how much pride Taako takes in making it. He can act like that wasn't a big deal, but Cisco knows it must have felt like the end of the world. ]

hey man if you ever figure out how to do it, teach me.

i thought it was my fault for 5 fucking years cause i used magic right? to make the show look good and i thought i'd fucked up

the chalice showed me what really happened

[And it was such a relief, that it wasn't his fault.

The fact of Sazed's betrayal had sunken in later.]

hey so this is fuckign depressing, huh?

jesus, really?
you're telling me he just got away with it?

[ Cisco had been kind of assuming that Taako had realized right away, and that he'd... gotten whatever payback he needed to get. The knowledge that he'd been stuck blaming himself for that long and Sazed got off scot free is way way worse. ]

it is and that's my bad
i was supposed to be cheering you up and i'm totally just making it worse

he sure fucking did, i dont even know where the asshole is now

dead, hopefully. or he will be soon enough i guess

[With the whole... Hunger thing.]

my dude, its cool. pretty sure no matter what you tried this was gonna be shitty. im very drunk

i guess that counts as a silver lining?

[ Not much of one as far as Cisco's concerned. ]

naw man fuck that
i don't believe in inevitable shittiness
where you at anyway? i can come there and we can be very drunk together at least.
do bad karaoke or play pool or whatever.

im gonna take it

[If nothing else, at least Sazed will be super dead. It's nice to think about.]

first of all, im fucking amazing at karaoke, even when drunk. im at some bar called sylva's? its not like, amazing. you dont have to drag your ass all the way over here just cause im a mopey fuck

[ Cisco's already pulling on a jacket any heading out the door before he gets Taako's reply. His goggles can wait, and he's long since stopped working on them in between texts. ]

oh reeeeeeaaaaally? what's your best karaoke song? like your most reliable showstopper?

sure, i know i don't have to, but i'm absolutely gonna

[For all that he said the night is likely to turn out shitty no matter what,
Taako is willing to take this distraction.]

assuming we're sticking to earth shit since anything else is gonna be meaningless to you

pretty much any beyonce song is guaranteed to turn the place into boner central

[ Cisco knows that in the end distractions don't solve anything, but he doubts any real solutions were even possible tonight when Taako's already plastered and morose. ]

hey come on give me some credit, i'm totally down to learn about tunes from other worlds!

i knew you were a man of fine taste
i'd say we could do a duet of feeling myself and i could do the nicki bits but i feel like that would be too powerful
like i think we might honest to god start a riot

no no no no

you don't get to dangle that in front of me then snatch it away

this is fucking happening whether you like it or not

okay, but you're paying for any collateral damage to the karaoke place, not me

[ Sylva's is, it turns out, a pretty long walk from Cisco's apartment, but he doesn't want to let the conversation flag or give Taako opportunities to think too much about sad stuff. ]

be nice to do karaoke with someone who's not an awful singer
i used to go with my friends caitlin and ronnie and i love them but like
that shit was HAUNTING

my eta's like 10 minutes you should write up a track list

worth it

how do you know im not an awful singer, maybe im TErRIBLE but im hot enough to make up for it

[He isn't, but!]

wait shit we have a problem. this place does not have karaoke but i think somewhere nearby does, i can meet you out front?

i guess i'll just have to wait and see.

naw, you can wait for me inside, i'll get a drink and slam it and then we can find a karaoke spot. i got some catching up to do.

[ Cisco isn't actually planning on getting as drunk as Taako clearly is, but he can at least get a bit of a buzz going, maintain the illusion that it's just a fun night out.

He keeps chatting at Taako, mostly embarrassing karaoke stories (which he honestly has way too many of in his arsenal), and walking quickly, and soon enough he's coming through the door to the bar Taako's at. It is, indeed, kind of a dive. Cisco's just a touch out of breath, but tries to pretend not to be as he makes his way over, hopping up onto the stool beside Taako. ]

Hey, come here often?

[Taako has, in the interest of not looking like a complete mess, ensured that the bartender cleared away the depressing collection of shot glasses that had gathered in front of him, replacing it with a glass of water that he's working his way through.

He's not about to sober up like, any time soon, but he should at least stop drinking for the moment.

When Cisco appears beside him, Taako grins, resting an elbow on the bar so he can prop his chin in his hand.]

Is that the best line you've got, darling?

[ Cisco isn't really all that surprised that, outwardly, at least, Taako doesn't look like a mess at all. He's got magic for that, and Cisco knows it's not just vanity that makes Taako conceal when he is feeling weak. But that isn't going to fool him; too many of the details from their text conversation keep replaying in his head. Cisco is worried, beneath his smile. ]

Yeah, well, you haven't taught me any of those elvish pickup lines yet, have you.

[ He asks the bartender to get him two shots of tequila, which seems like plenty to start with. Once she's walked away to get that for him, Cisco leans in closer to Taako and says in a low enough voice that he probably won't be overheard. ]

You weren't kidding about this place being a dump, geeze. How is everything sticky?!

[ Cisco wrinkles his nose melodramatically, touching his palm to the top of the bar and then pulling it away in disgust. ]

And you don't know any in English?

[He arches an eyebrow, which is kind of ruined by the fact he's got that slightly glassy-eyed, drunk person look going on.]

The trick is years of never cleaning the place, but uh, the drinks are cheap and I was puh-retty sure I wasn't gonna run into anyone I knew, so...

[It seemed like a good choice at the time.]

I don't know if you've noticed but I'm not exactly the world's suavest guy.

[ He's a little better at approaching people when he's fairly drunk, but that's neither here nor there. Cisco would much rather let Taako have a good time roasting him for his awkwardness than correct him right now. ]

Okay, I get you on the anonymity thing, that's way more important.

[ And Cisco pulls an actual honest-to-goodness wet wipe from one of his pockets, uses it to clean his hands while the bartender is pouring his shots. Once she's done, Cisco shoots her a big smile and lifts one of the glasses. ]

Down the hatch.

[ He downs the shot with a grimace, pausing for a gasp of breath before he's picking up the other and swallowing it, too. ]

God... that really, truly tastes like nail polish remover.

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